$5.01. Why is that amount important? It recently replaced $64 as a significant amount in my head. Which replaced $1500 before it. $64 was the amount I recalled every time I heard the name “Lucca”. Lucca is the name of my roommates drooly, Horse/dog who left a plethora of slobber trails on my favorite, black comforter. So much so that it looked like the Snail Daytona 500. $64 was the dry cleaning cost. SCAM! I could have bought a new comforter and my favorite Starbuck’s brew. Which coincidentally brings up the new dollar amount; $5.01. That’s the amount remaining on my Starbuck’s Gold card. When it’s gone, I’ll be leaving my ‘old friend’ behind. It’s kind of a weight gain/white teeth thing and partially the fact that the president of Starbuck’s hates what I stand for. Alas. I sit here today, sipping my fave coffee, using WIFI and thinking of all the amazing times I’ve had here: bible studies, testimony shares, big life convos and a few chance meetings.
As I left the house today, I noticed a few things that settled my heart greatly. Today, different than days gone by, I left the house and I actually “LEFT THE HOUSE”. The yard was mowed, the plants were watered, my roommate was sleeping, morning devotions were amazing, the garbage and recycling guys had come and all was in right order. You know what I am talking about. I left with a clear head that there was nothing to manage or fix or worry about for a moment. My little Honda purred along as if it were a 2014, not a 2000 and life was “quiet” and good. Don’t get me wrong, life is good everyday, even when I am debating friends and fending off “tolerant” haters, God is still God. Today was different. The voice of the enemy was quiet and subdued for a moment and the peace of God was…well…palpable. One of those days where you remember your bank websites password on the first try and the line at the ATM disappears as you pull into your spot.
Devotions this morning were all about keeping our walk with God pure and 100%. I heard once again, in God’s own words that we are to offer up to Him our best, our first, Our Everything. As I live out this life before God and before other men choosing holiness over homosexuality, it isn’t easy. Every morning there is another perceived victory for the gay agenda and “equality”. Every moment the enemy whispers another jab against my testimony and my resolve. That’s okay though. This ministry we are a part of isn’t for the masses of the global market. It is for those men and women to whom God has opened their eyes and revealed the truth of His Word regarding God ordained sexuality.
God gave me the perfect visual of our ministry. Satan, the enemy of our souls, has his hand around the throat of every man and woman of the gay community. God showed me a large colander suspended in the air. It was stuffed full of gay men and women. They represented the masses of the gay community sold out to homosexuality. Every once in a while a person would fall out of one of the holes in the colander, breaking free of the others. God drew my attention to those few people and said, “That is where your ministry begins.” Big Fish Ministry doesn’t exist to take on the gay agenda, debate the masses or wag a shaming finger at the gay community. We are less “Kick the Hornet’s Nest” and more “Hospital Triage Unit”. I, too, was broken or celebratory, however you choose to see it, about my gay life. I was very good at it for many years, yet I have more compassion for the gay community than most Christians. Don’t believe me? Ask my gay friends. Caring for their well being and loving them into hell are two very different things.
I believe in the truth and the power of God’s word to lead a man or woman out of homosexuality. My life is evidence of that fact. Over the last 14 years I have seen other men walk free as well. I am thankful to God for that fact today. Thankful for the peace I felt this morning, after many years of struggle, to do the right thing and serve my God the best way I know how. I was challenged this morning though. To love God wholeheartedly. To lead men better. To share Jesus like Peter and John; emboldened by the Holy Spirit and overflowing with gratitude. To live a life surrendered to Jesus Christ, despite what CNN says is legal, supported or widely accepted. The road to the cross of Christ is a narrow and scarcely traveled. I am only on the road, because Jesus Christ chose to illuminate the path and call me out of darkness. And because of a praying father. My prayer today, in this wonderful moment of peace, is one of rapture. Rapture for men and women still struggling in darkness, contemplating checking out and in need of a savior. I speak this from an empathetic heart, not from a soapbox of judgment. God, Call them out. Let their hearts and souls be rescued.